The Confederacy of New Palmdale is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by George Newman with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, complete lack of prisons, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cheerful, devout population of 3.128 billion New Palmdaleans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kramer. The average income tax rate is 31.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient New Palmdalean economy, worth 687 trillion pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 219,782 pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Genocide is seen as a topic best avoided in history lessons, kindergartners love the free balloons that their schools give them, farting etiquette is taught in schools, and streakers swamp all public events in order to bare it all. Crime is totally unknown. New Palmdale's national animal is the hippo, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Wallyism.

New Palmdale is ranked 13,973^rd in the world and 15^th in Africa for Highest Food Quality, scoring 139.47 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.